The secret to staying young from I Love Lucy

This is something to think about.

~ Coach Lora Erickson

BlondeRunner.com

I don’t want to brag joke

LOL

Funny video clip: Marathon thoughts

Yes, there are certainly ups and downs during a marathon.

New Year Resolutions Change Joke

Twins Blonde Joke

The other day my neighbor, who is blonde, came running up to me in the driveway jumping for joy! I didn’t know why she was jumping so excitedly but I thought, ‘what the heck’, and I starting jumping up and down along with her.

She said, ‘I have some really great news!’

I said, ‘Great.  Tell me why you’re so happy.’

She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and down and told me that she was pregnant.

I knew she’d been trying for a while so I told her, ‘That’s great I couldn’t be happier for you!’

Then she said, ‘There’s more.’

I asked, ‘what do you mean there’s more.’

She said, ‘Well, we are not having just one baby.  We are going to have TWINS!’

Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her how she knew. She said….

‘Well, that was the easy part.  I went to store and they actually had a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack.  Both tests came out positive.’

The Jigsaw Puzzle Blonde Joke

A blonde calls her boyfriend and says, “Please come over here and help me. I have a killer jigsaw puzzle, and I can’t figure out how to get it started.”

He asks, “What is it supposed to be when it’s finished?”

The blonde says, “According to the picture on the box, it’s a tiger.”

Her boyfriend decides to go over and help with the puzzle. She lets him in and shows him where she has the puzzle spread all over the table.

He studies the pieces for a moment, then looks at the box, then turns to her and says, “First of all, no matter what we do, we’re not going to be able to assemble these pieces into anything resembling a tiger.”

He takes her hand and says, “Second, I want you to relax, and then…..” he sighed, “we’ll put all these Frosted Flakes back in the box.”

THE GYNECOLOGIST WHO BECAME A MECHANIC JOKE

THE GYNECOLOGIST WHO BECAME A MECHANIC

A gynecologist had become fed up with malpractice insurance and HMO paperwork,
and was burned out. Hoping to try another career where skillful hands would be
beneficial, he decided to become a mechanic. He went to the local technical
college, signed up for evening classes, attended diligently, and learned all he
could.
When the time of the practical exam approached, the gynecologist prepared
carefully for weeks, and completed the exam with tremendous skill. When the
results came back, he was surprised to find that he had obtained a score of
150%. Fearing an error, he called the Instructor, saying, “I don’t want to
appear ungrateful for such an outstanding result, but I wonder if there is an
error in the grade?”
“The instructor said, “During the exam, you took the engine apart perfectly,
which was worth 50% of the total mark. You put the engine back together again
perfectly, which is also worth 50% of the mark.”
After a pause, the instructor added, “I gave you an extra 50% because you did it
all through the muffler, which I’ve never seen done in my entire career”.

Smile.  Have a great day.

Natural Childbirth comedy clip

This is one of my favorite comedy clips of all time. Push ‘em out, shove ‘em out…way out! Bill Cosby is hilarious. Enjoy!

Ice fishing Blonde Joke

I love to fish, but I must admit - I have never made this mistake. Enjoy.
- Coach Lora “Blonde Runner”

Ice Fishing Blonde Joke
A blonde wanted to go ice fishing, so after getting all of the right gear, she headed toward the nearest frozen lake. After getting comfy on her stool she started to cut a circular hole in the ice.
Then from the heavens a voice boomed, “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
Startled, the blonde moved further down the ice, poured a thermos of hot chocolate and started to cut another hole in the ice.
Again the voice boomed, “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
This time quite scared, the blonde moved to the far end of the ice. Then she started another hole and once again the voice said, “THERE ARE NO FISH UNDER THE ICE.”
The very scared blonde raised her head and said, “Is that You, Lord?”
The voice answered, “NO. IT’S THE MANAGER OF THE ICE RINK.”

Why women accumulate weight

With time, women gain weight because we accumulate so much information and wisdom in our heads that when there is no more room, it distributes out to the rest of our bodies. So we aren’t heavy, we are enormously cultured, educated and happy.

Beginning today, when I look at my butt in the mirror I will think,

“Good grief, look how smart I am!”

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