swedish chef spaghetti
January 30, 2010 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes, Nutrition
This is why you should avoid eating too many carbs lol
Big smile
November 16, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
How far would you go to show someone you love them?
November 16, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
A Blonde cooks diary entry for the week
November 16, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
☺It’s fun to cook for Tom. Today I made angel food cake. The recipe said beat 12 eggs separately. The neighbors were nice enough to loan me some extra bowls.
☺Tom wanted fruit salad for supper. The recipe said serve without dressing. So I didn’t dress. What a surprise when Tom brought a friend home for supper
☺A good day for rice. The recipe said wash thoroughly before steaming the rice. It seemed kind of silly but I took a bath anyway. I can’t say it improved the rice any.
☺Today Tom asked for salad again I tried a new recipe. It said prepare ingredients; lay on a bed of lettuce one hour before serving. Tom asked me why I was rolling around in the garden.
☺I found an easy recipe for cookies. It said put the ingredients in a bowl and beat it. There must have been something wrong with this recipe. When I got back, everything was the same as when I left.
☺Tom did the shopping today and brought home a chicken. He asked me to dress it for Sunday. I don’t have any clothes that fit it, and for some reason Tom keeps counting to ten.
☺Tom’s folks came to dinner. I wanted to serve roast but all I had was hamburger. Suddenly I had a flash of genius. I put the hamburger in the oven and set the controls for roast. It still came out hamburger, much to my disappointment.
GOOD NIGHT DEAR DIARY. This has been a very exciting week! I am eager for tomorrow to come so I can try out a new recipe on Tom. If I can talk Tom into buying a bigger oven, I would like to surprise him with a chocolate moose.
Blonde thinks she has won a motor home
November 16, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
A blonde goes into a restaurant and notices there’s
A ‘peel and win’ sticker on her beverage cup.
So she peels it off and starts screaming,
‘I’ve won a motor home!
I’ve won a motor home!’
The waitress says, ‘That’s impossible.
The biggest prize is a free Lunch.?’
But the blonde keeps on screaming,
‘I’ve won a motor home!
I’ve won a motor home!’
Finally, the manager comes over and says,
‘Ma’am, I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken.
You couldn’t have possibly won a motor home
Because we didn’t have that as a prize.
The blonde says, ‘No, it’s not a mistake.
I’ve won a motor home!’
And she hands the ticket to the
Manager and HE reads…
‘W I N A B A G E L’
Skydiving Blonde Joke
October 29, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says “Two Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.”
The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing “That’s horrible!!! So many men dying that way!”
Confused, he says, “Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving, and there is always that risk involved.”
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, “How many is a Brazilian?”
IN A VACUUM
July 3, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
A blonde was playing Trivial Pursuit one night. It was her turn. She rolled the dice and she landed on Science & Nature. Her question was, “If you are in a vacuum and someone calls your name, can you hear it?”
She thought for a time and then asked, “Is it on or off?”
I’d like to order…joke
June 13, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
Oh, this is funny!
Blonde Jokes April 29
April 28, 2009 by admin
Filed under Blonde Jokes
A blonde is watching the news with her husband when the newscaster says 6
Brazilian men die in a skydiving accident.
The blonde starts crying to her husband, sobbing “That’s horrible.”
Confused, he says, “Yes dear, it is sad, but they were skydiving and there
is that risk involved.”
After a few minutes, the blonde, still sobbing, says, “How many is a
Brazilian?
The Pregnant Blonde
The other day my neighbor, who is blonde, came running up to me in the
driveway jumping for joy! I didn’t know why she was jumping so excitedly
but I thought, ‘what the heck’, and I starting jumping up and down along with her.
She said, ‘I have some really great news!’
I said, ‘Great. Tell me why you’re so happy.’
She stopped jumping and breathing heavily from all the jumping up and
down, told me that she was pregnant. I knew she’d been trying for a while
so I told her, ‘That’s great I couldn’t be happier for you!’
Then she said, ‘There’s more’
I asked, What do you mean there’s more.
She said, ‘Well, we are not having just one baby. We are going to have
TWINS!’
Amazed at how she could know so soon after getting pregnant, I asked her
how she knew. She said….
(You’re going to love this!)
‘Well, that was the easy part. I went to Sam’s Club and they actually had
a home pregnancy kit in a TWIN-pack. Both tests came out positive!’
Doc, It Hurts All Over
A woman explains to the doctor, “When I touch my arm, ouch, it hurts. When I touch my leg, ouch, it hurts. When I touch my head, ouch, it hurts. When I touch my chest, ouch it hearts.”
The doctor just shakes his head and asks, “You’re a natural blonde, aren’t you?”
The women smiles and says,”Why, yes I am. How did you know?”
The doctor replies, “Because your finger is broken.”
Other Side
A blonde goes out for a run. She comes to a river and cannot see a bridge anywhere nearby. She spots another blonde on the opposite bank.
“How can I get to the other side?”
The second blonde looks up the river then down the river than shouts back,
“You’re already on the other side!”
Blonde on the Sun
A Russian, an American, and a Blonde were talking one day.
The Russian said, ‘We were the first in space!”
The American said, “We were the first on the moon!”
The Blonde said, “So what? We’re going to be the first on the sun!”
The Russian and the American looked at each other and shook their heads.
“You can’t land on the sun, you idiot! You’ll burn up! said the Russian.
To which the Blonde replied, “We’re not stupid, ya know. We’re going at night!”
What did the blonde say when she opened the box of Cheerios?
“Oh, look donut seeds.”
The Runner
An overweight blonde consulted her doctor for advice. The doctor advised that she run ten miles a day for thirty days. This, he promised, would help her lose as many as twenty pounds. The blonde followed the doctor’s advice, and, after thirty days, she was pleased to find that she had indeed lost the pesky twenty pounds. She phoned the doctor and thanked him for the wonderful advice which produced such effective results. At the end of the conversation, however, she asked one last question: “How do I get home, since I am now 300 miles away?”
On a Diet
A blonde woman is terribly overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet. “I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat this procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”
When the blonde returned, she shocked the doctor by losing nearly 20 pounds.
“Why, that’s amazing!” the doctor said. “Did you follow my instructions?”
The blonde nodded. “I’ll tell you though, I thought I was going to drop dead that third day.”
“From hunger, you mean?” asked the doctor.
“No, from skipping.”
Do you have a blonde joke you want to share? Send it to me lora@blonderunner.com - I am always up for a laugh.
How a woman’s brain works
January 28, 2009 by Lora
Filed under Blonde Jokes
My husband sent this to me. This might explain why some women, like me, have to wind down before falling asleep at night. We both agreed. Ahh, laughter the best medicine. Enjoy!
Ever wondered how a woman’s brain works?
It’s finally explained here in one, easy-to-understand illustration:
Every one of those little blue balls is a thought about something that needs to be done, a decision or a problem that needs to be solved.
